GRRRRRRRRRRR!

MY DAUGHTER IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!!!!!!!!

"I'm going into town after school" she texted. "No you're not" I texted back! My daughter is supposed to stay for homework and then gets the n gets the minibus home afterwards. This suits us and her teachers fine because we have enough problems getting her to complete her homework and the hurdles she wishes to put in the way do not help. She then walked in late and she had agreed to go with her brother trick or treating so basically let him down. Oh I could have spat!!! (Of course I didn't) but she's making me so mad and then it's the attitude when she does get in! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I've allowed her to go out however she has ONE HOUR. Yes that did cause problems and she has had a tantrum but I'm not having her call the shots. How dare she! I'm the parent not her and she has come home in one funny mood which I will put a stop too. I did not want to let her brother down though and that was the only reason I allowed her to go out at all, I'm now working out (or is it hatching a plan?) Yes I think that's the correct terminology? Teens nowadays are so rude and do not realise that they are talking to adults, kids or the pavement! I don't think my daughter was happy when I told her she was paying for the hour it took our cleaning lady to do her clothes today.....Actually it took an hour and a half and she will be paying for every penny.

The worst part about this is I adore my daughter. I would give anything.....my life for my daughter but she treats me like scum. She's a 14 year old who is going to be grounded for a very long time for her behaviour and language today.

Happy Birthday Mum

Today is my mum's birthday. I wish I could put a photo of her here but I cannot not get my bluetooth between my phone and my computer to work.......

The kids think of today as just Halloween but for me it is much more. Another year has gone past without my mother in my life but I do not feel as sad as I have done in the past. I still bought my mum a card and I would have loved to have gone up to the grave however my pain levels (oh here we go again!) mean it is impossible to drive that far.

Tomorrow is another day of worry......I'm going to speak with the HT at the school where I am currently a governor. What do I do when I really do not know what I want to do? I cannot talk about why I feel so upset with the governing side of things, that's too complex and too confidential.......Just really do not know what to do and right now I need to move about as I can't sit still with this leg hurting!!!!

Back At School

I love my kids but I can honestly say I am grateful they have gone back to the extablishments we are paying to send them to. My son scored 19/20 in a French test on day one so he's a happy bunny, my daughter's school pool is now open after six weeks of repairs and so she has a slight smile on her face too (which is remarkable for a teenager) and my rabbits are enjoying being left alone to roam around the garden so they are also happy bunnies too. (Oh yes the punn is intended.)

Talking of my mad rabbits they have been quite taken with their new friends. You can see "Russell's" legs in the photo above, I don't have a photo of Florence, Jim rabbit's teddy, but if I did it would have Jim humping her! We are expecting ted-bits any day now and my poor son was quite traumatised when first saw Jimmy's .....how shall we say 'anatomy!' So traumatised he has told everyone about it non stop ever since. Lol.

I must get this out of the gutter.

Buying a new TV as ours is on its way out. The picture is flickering and the colour is coming and going and to repair it is not cost effective. We have looked at the cost of TVs and found one we like and found a good place to buy that particular one from. Can't believe we will be paying £300 less for a better TV!!!

Congratulations!

The beginning of this entry goes out to a very dear friend of mine who I did not get a moment to call last week who has become a grandmother for the second time last week. Welcome to the world little girl. I'm not giving details as too much info on the net is never a good thing is it? I have learnt not to divulge names nowadays because of nutcases who seem to think it is OK to make your life hell and the Internet is a great way to gain knowledge about you and your loved ones. Enough of that, congrats dear friend, love to you and your loved ones!

Life in the wiglet household has been rather difficult over the past few days and I'd rather not be living here. Yesterday was yet another confrontation with Mr Wiglet and it was a case of me telling him he MUST go back to counselling. The problem is he stopped at the point when he had opened the box full of all of his woes and now that box is open he cannot close it again yet he still does not know how to control his feelings about it? He is struggling emotionally, physically and in every which way you could imagine and I love him more than words can say but he is repeating a pattern of which his father set for him. He is causing so much pain in our family.......so much pain that he must have inside of him! I've been there so I know how he must be feeling and want him to feel better. He HAS to go back to counselling, whether it be with the same person he saw before or whether it be with someone new? I don't care as long as he deals with those demons which are destroying him.......He knows if he does not do this NOW our marriage is over. I don't know what marriage is half the time and is our marriage normal? If a marriage is when a couple love each other but at times hate each other then that is us. If a marriage is when we both want similar things but one of us has lost the emotional drive and one has lost the physical drive then that is us. It's an odd marriage and I just do not understand us? We have spoken to TWO counsellors together. One is our daughter's counsellor and one my old one some years ago and both say we are a perfect match but have issues to get through. My problem is I cannot sit back and watch my husband repeat that pattern again because it is destroying his relationship with his children; this in turn could cause this pattern to repeat again with the children with their own children.....I cannot let that happen. I don't know how many times I've cried about that. That's what makes me so angry and so upset in equal measure.

My head has been hurting for the past two weeks and it is hardly surprising is it? There is a virus floating about........Mind you my head always seems to get worse when the family is around!

Kids back at school on Monday. My son has been a breeze in general so fingers crossed it will stay that way. My daughter has been told to keep her room tidy or I told her I would make her wash all of her clothes again - EVERY SINGLE ITEM IN HER WARDROBES AND DRAWERS. She did not keep to the rules and so today I said; "Get your washing on".

Her mouth dropped.

I let her know if she cleared up she could stop washing and ironing so after THREE lots of washing she has successfully completed her job.

Me thinks she has got the message. (AHA!!!!!!!)

Head is a-hurting.

Stealing

How do you deal with a 14 year old who has stolen from you?

With difficulty that's how.........

It has been a hard couple of weeks in the Wiglet household and I've not had much time on the net. I've got to try and get hold of some old friends who seem to have had troubles with my new email addy too today as well as I do NOT want to lose them....That would be worse than anything I could bare to think about! Also must phone a friend 'up north' at some point this week as I keep forgetting about that too. She's had an appointment with her pain person and I'd love to catch up on how that went and general chitchat that goes with it. I love our natters.

But back to the 14 stealing......I've had this doubt for a couple of weeks but you know when you cannot quite believe it to be true? How could your own daughter be stealing from you? At first she admitted to it being 45pence here and there but finally she has admitted it's been in total £25 with £15 in one day from her father's wallet. How he didn't notice that is beyond me. He's taking it all personally instead of seeing that actually he has a part to play here. I don't mean to blame him as my daughter has to take responsibility for her actions but so does my husband.
You see, we made an agreement that my husband pays out pocket money every Sunday and he keeps 'forgetting'. If he forgets then it is letting the children down and hardly fair to them. Four weeks ago our daughter was banned from gettting her pocket money and THAT was the week she stole the £15, but she had been taking the smaller items of money over a period of over days before that because my husband had not been paying out. It's OK for me to say "Don't worry I've noted down every single penny you should be getting paid", however, the kids are not getting ANYTHING! This is totally unjust and it is driving me insane. My issue of course is I am disabled and find it so hard to get about and so leave it to the husband to be responsible to something ie the pocket money. He is their father after all!

I also have to ask my husband to leave me money so it is not just the kids who rely on him and if the children are going out I will ensure they are never short of a few quid and so I feel very let down today with my daughter and hurt by her actions.

So what did we do? I asked her why she needed the money? It was for topping up her phone (which is NEVER an issue and I will always give her money so I think it is more than that and will talk to her when hubby is not around)We told her she has to pay us back a pound a week. We felt asking her to pay us back all in one go is asking for trouble because she may see temptation in the way if she has no money and steal again. pound a week is good enough. We told her we need to be able to trust her and now that is difficult because she has broken that trust. I told her she must talk to me if she needs money for whatever reason......And have just caught her alone after hubby has gone off on his own and yes the money was for topping up phone, going to the pier with friends after school and generally cheering herself up with chocolate. This worries me enormously.....my daughter is comfort eating constantly, underweight (though not massively but enough for us to worry) and hiding chocolate wrappers in her bedroom. She is NOT binge eating nor vommiting food she eats for her dinners but she is using foods we all know give us a natural high. We have spoken to a counsellor and we have tried to get our daughter to speak to a counsellor but she's not ready to do this and so until then we are speaking to the counsellor and getting support from her; this has been hugely helpful. Oh there's another reason why my daughter steals from her dad and not me, its because she doesn't like him much.

My husband has been very ............Oh I can't think of the word? He's been such hard work again and we've argued again today before any of this started. It is not a good day and he has taken our daughter's actions personally which is silly? He needs to speak to someone on his own.....I wish he would do this now as I don't know how much longer I can tolerate this marriage like this. I feel like I am existing and I'm very very unhappy.

I'd love to be romanced. Candles on the table, dinner cooked.....salmon would be nice with a sauce of some description, then a pud to follow. A couple of glasses of wine to wash it all down with and Bob's your uncle.
Alas that never happens with my man. Either I cook with my pain levels or it DOES NOT HAPPEN...................Think I need to stop crying and now I have another reason possibly why my daughter stole from her dad? Maybe she is getting revenge for me? I don't think she understands that though, I do.

Tally Ho!

Well jolly hockey sticks and lashings of rugger were the order of the day yesterday when we went to visit the favoured senior school my son wishes to go too.

We certainly felt comfortable with this enormous palace like building. We were shown around by a third former who I shall praise in a letter of thanks as he deserves a few mars bars from his house master, (a treat normally given for good Latin scores apparently). Our guide was a member of an exclusively day house however day boys can be members of boarding house which is what my son would like to do. Once he had viewed the differences between the day houses and boarding he had made his mind up.

We have found out that my son will be able to board overnight free of charge if he has a commitment which means he has to remain at the school till 9pm. This is for a House dinner for instance which they have regularly. My son is so excited about this as he fancies boarding now and then, once or twice but not all of the time. He'll be 13 and a half by then and much more mature too........ More of a teen!

I don't think it is the right school for my daughter and neither does she. She'd like to go to a co-ed school for sixthform and I'd agree with that so let's see what happens. I just hope she works over the next two years or goodness knows what will happen to her? I do worry.....She is a wonderful girl with a scatty but creative mind. She'll get there.

Bloody pain monster is crucifying me today. Obviously all of that walking yesterday just was too much. Pain meds and staying in bed all day have helped. Wireless broadband is a marvelous thing and it is not even mine; (that's a worry!!!!)

Strange World

Funny phonecalls, strange what happens in life? I don't want to talk about this too much but suffice to say I have something odd going on in my life again.

My whole life seems to be full of strange oddities and sometimes I do not know if I am coming or a going? I didn't sleep last night. No, I lie, I slept for about an hour in total so I feel very tired now. I have just had my morning cuddle with my rabbits which makes the world feel much more a better place and all is right with the world.......except it is not.

I have my appointment with the bowel surgeon today and I will see what he has got to say? If he is anything like the last one then I'm in trouble! Being told the only option is to have my bowel removed is pretty dire. I'll let you know tomorrow what this one says.