I Have My Ultrasound Scan Date!

My thinks my GP may have phoned someone and got the ball rolling even quicker......

Last time the letter resulted in another letter with an "Eleven week" waiting list. Have a date this morning of NEXT TUESDAY!

I must admit I started to feel sick yesterday again and had stomach ache but that may have been a tummy problem anyway and I could be putting all stomach pain down to my gallbladder? I'm going to have a scan of my gallbladder, liver, pancreas, kidneys and spleen. In total my GP's 'urgent' scan will have taken a good three months with our trusted (ha bloody ha) NHS.

Today though I am in hypochondria overdrive with this lump on cheek bone. It did not hurt yesterday but last night gave me a headache/eye pain. If I prod it today, it will produce pain as an after effect - So I shall not prod it! I can so a small dot which may indicate a bite? Nothing raised? It (I think) has come about since I started using the corticosteroid nasal spray so today I decided not to use it. I have this silly fear that it is skin cancer and a steroid will make it worsen......Told you I was a hypochondriac didn't I?
Still got this terrible cough but eating OK. I am so tired all the time and my body is not right and I want someone to find out what is wrong with me.

I am scared to find out about next week and my husband is working days and under normal circumstances I would get a cab and all would be fine but what if something is found on the scan? What if it is not my gallbladder? What if my GP heard something when he listened to my chest on Friday and this is why my scan has arrived within a week? Now I am being ridiculous! Nothing was heard, NOTHING. Just a bit fed up with never feeling 100% but maybe that is because I am on medication and crave to be off these meds?

One day......

Anyone who has faith and who is willing, please pray that the scan will only indicate a gallbladder problem next week. I can handle that. Don't know why I am so worried about it. Actually I do. There was a woman who I occasionally posted too at a forum and that dear lady was called called Marcia. One day she posted talking about how ill she felt. She was losing weight and coughing up blood (Of course I am not oh thankfully!) The next news was a shadow on her liver and then nothing. Three weeks later a friend of hers, who was also a member of the forum, posted to say she had cancer of the liver which had spread everywhere it could. She had died within three weeks of diagnosis. She had hardly any money and chose not to see a doctor earlier because she could not afford it. She was such a lovely lady who always wrote a with what I can imagine a smile on her face. I imagine she is smiling now and has no pain. Some other people at that forum undermined it by being deceptive and then others chose to have multiple names but when you meet just one lady like Marcia who was genuine and kind and thoughtful you know there are good people out there too.
I met others like Marcia on that forum, Daisy is one such lady, Shysmom, Pud, Natty, Jynx, Angel 17, Tyke, Ah my Aussie friends too and many more too. I wish I could face forums again but life in a forum would be living a lie because I could not be me and if I cannot be me then I shall not be part of that sort of life......Shame because I like it.

My last words go out to the parents of little Maddy who is still missing in Portugal. Five days on and still no news and I cannot possibly imagine how they must feel and do not want to if I am honest. No parent can imagine this happening as it does not make sense? I still hope and pray that Madeleine McGann is brought home safe and well but the longer it goes on the more the fear in my heart grows. Again anyone reading this, please PLEASE pray, send positive thoughts, do whatever you need to do for those parents. Whether they were 50 yards away having a meal or 100 yards, they still checked on those kids regularly and the doors and shutters were locked and the hotel site was also a place where children were supposed to be safe........"If Only" will haunt their hearts so what is the point in saying anything about it?

Bring Maddy back safely is all that needs to be said to the person/s keeping her